Well, the old song goes "War...what is it good for (absolutely nothing)" to wit I have substituted the word Shame (Good God!).
I am not a librarian (but I play one on TV). I have apparently over stepped my clerical bounds (and I admit some of my recent behavior was over the top) but the response from the Powers That Be (PTB) has been to shame me for my pretenses. I still am uncertain whether I received a written reprimand last week or if it was the step before. I was complaining about the level of cologne in the immediate area about me and I was over the top in terms of sarcasm and my behavior deemed unprofessional. Well, if the PTB were anything but academic wusses they would have taken the initiative, as they apparently have now, to mandate a cologne free work space. It's coming ladies and gents. But the shame that was heaped upon me was uncalled for. Not even the squeaky wheel gets greased around here as everyone should be one big happy family. I complained about cologne, as I know others did, but I became the bad guy, the face of the problem. And of course there was my insubordinate behavior about an authority records (that would have been deemed good and proper use of a librarian--being thorough and exacting). I am unclear as how I can be both insubordinate and at the same time unprofessional but I think if I had THE DEGREE my outward behavior would have been acceptable. Oh, I have a advanced degree, a Masters of Arts in history, a degree program that required learning a language and the writing of a thesis, neither of which is a requirement of the MLS degree program. Okay, sometimes I get full of myself, the grandiosity that is part and parcel of being bipolar (Happy Birthday Vincent!), and I admit I overstep my nonprofessional role. But as Jack used to say "I know things..." The unofficial reprimand was full of shaming language and I felt a good deal of anger and upset.
Well, I spoke with Aunt Marilyn last night and she told me to tell it to someone in charge. That I would feel better taking the bull by the horns. As I am very upset about what has transpired over the last few days regards my role on the Ergonomics Committee and a visit from a cousin who has developed some ergonomic tools that he assumed I could do a trial for him, I became shamed once more. I am too upset to speak to the Director but, as I often do, my writing is my strong suit, so I wrote the Director a long letter about the most recent incident regarding the ergonomic equipment I am testing. I never represented myself as an agent of the University nor as someone whose opinion matters, as I assume mine doesn't, but at 10:30 last night I composed a long letter indicating that the who situation was unfair and that my years of service should merit me some degree of not only latitude but also some kindness. I wrote: "I am being held to a standard I don't deserve. My intent was only to serve the library and maybe save some money along the way...I never represented myself as anything I wasn't. I'd say the situation is not fair, but then we know life isn't about fairness. But it is about treating a person with some degree of respect and I believe I merit some degree of respect."
So that is my story and I am sticking to it. I will see how the Director handles the letter, if at all.
And now children it is time to put away such childish things like a blog and get to my professional/clerical work.
Ta-ta
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