The report

The MRI report basically is a mish mosh of old age problems, including osteopenia related fractures. Also, some tendinitis in the Achilles, arthritis in the foot, a hematoma, and as the king said, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.  Couldn't bear to go back to work this week as walking with crutches is about all the work I can tolerate.  I have been sleeping a lot and much to Sophie's dismay not eating very much.  Simcha Cat has been giving me repeated Cat Scans and basically staying by my side all day and night.  Yankel seems content to want me to trip over him, or maybe fall on him, while Gonif is happily slumbering in his nest.  I endeavored to sleep in bed last night and that was a disaster.  I am running out of places that deliver food and the birds keep rapping on the back door for food.  Sophie will take care of some of that today along with her sister Ethel.   The Rabbi came to see me yesterday and to discuss a music night at the synagogue, and no, that is not something cryptic; the Rabii really did visit with me yesterday.  Basically I feel helpless and depended and you know how much I love feeling this way.

On Tuesday I had my second visit with Hyphen 2 and am confident that seeing her was the correct choice to make.  While it would have been nice to be able to walk to get to therapy, that shouldn't have been the only reason to have seen the $200 an hour Calvin's Mom.  Are you kidding me...$200 an hour for a psychologist...a forty five minute hour at that.  No therapist is worth that.

So home I sit while the town is awash in great events this weekend.  Depression is mounting.  What to do, what to do.  Back to work Monday.  Damn, this sucks.

MRI results

Showed a distal fracture of the tibia...so much for the "crack physicians" at Lansing Urgent Care.  Couldn't find their asses with both hands.  I have to call my primary care doctors in the morning to see what to do next.

But there you go...almost instantaneous results.  Thank God for MSU's Department of Radiology

More when the pain meds kick in.

Foot bones connected to the anklebone

Oh, them bones.  Seems a mere x-ray can't determine the cause of my ankle distress so it is on to an MRI.  God knows when that will happen.  I hope this week.  Meanwhile it is back to work with a limp.  The first few steps are the hardest but it matters not how long I rest or sit, a minute, an hour, ten seconds, but the first few steps are the hardest.  They kind of ruled out the Plantar thingies because of that.  My hope is it is nothing too serious and it will resolve itself in another week or two.  Meanwhile my rose garden is weedy, my tomato patch is sickly and I feel like a total and hopeless failure.  I can barely take care of myself, much less my house.  Ah, something to ponder as Hyphen 2 takes over.  Sophie, out of the goodness of her heart will be taking me next week.  New month but she better be available as Hyphen 2 has rather strict guidelines on missing appointments.  Oh, I want to go back to sleep as I didn't get much last night because of the pain.  I did practice this morning.  But not much.  That hurt too as I was trying to keep time with my bad leg.  Seems like a different part of the ankle hurts each day and each day is a new experience in pain.  Even crossing my legs hurts.  It's the uncertainty of the resolution that is paining me too.

Hyphen 2

Winner by a hair.  Actually a $200 hair.  Seems Calvin's Mom was not able to verify insurance as Hyphen 2 had already gotten approval.  Calvin's Mom doesn't believe in a trial visit  to see if you can work with the doctor.  So that said and done its on to weekly visits with Hyphen 2.  I left it to the PTB to decide my therapist and was spoken to in a $200 bass.  The decision was basically made for me.  Hyphen 2 is out of network and God knows how much her 20% co-pay is.  I'll find out next Tuesday.  Oh, fux and double fux.

Now excuse me while I rest my weary bones and give Simcha the belly rub he so richly deserves.

And the winner is...

Well, right now it's a tie.  As I sit home for yet another day due to this stupid leg injury that is keeping me from walking my walk, as well as talking the talk, I ponder....Hyphen 2 or Calvin's Mom.  So I decided to see each, one more time, in order to make a more informed decision.  Calvin's Mom has a strike against her as she took a call at during the first few minutes after our session began, a big strike in my book.  The mere fact that I could walk, if I could walk, to her office is not the only thing in her favor.  But that call taking really annoyed me.  Hyphen 2 is much like the original.  Very engaged and very intense.  I like that in a person.  Our session ran over fifteen minutes as she lost track of time.  If I had to choose based on that I'd take Hyphen 2.  But I want to be fair and see if Calvin's Mom can overcome that faux pas of the phone call.  Too close to call at this point.

As for this ankle injury that is slowly evolving, Urgent Care last week said it was a sprain and sent me on my way without so much as a fare thee well.  I am seeing my primary care doctor today and we will go from there.  I have virtually done nothing since last Tuesday when the injury just happened, like it does with people of a certain again.  No tripping, twisting or falling, just the sudden onset of pain when walking.  Today it feels slightly, ever so slightly, better.  I have to get back to work tomorrow but we shall see what the Doc says today.  I am tired of being in pain when I put any weight on the leg.  Urgent Care did take x-rays and said there were no breaks.  But something is wrong other than a sprain.

So that is basically my story for the last few days.  Shrinks and limping.  Limping and shrinks.

Achilles

Much like the Greek myth, I have been dipped in a magic potion but held by my heels.  My right Achilles  tendon is tender and it really hurts to walk, my drug of choice of late.  I finally have a brace on that ankle but I am afraid to go see  a doctor for fear I might be put on crutches to speed healing. No, instead I will wear the brace and take it easy on the walk therapy for a while.  I didn't sleep much last night, in part because the Pirates were losing to the Royals.  But I had one of those twilight sleepy nights where I wasn't fully asleep.  Not due to physical pain but more the. psychic and emotional pain.  I may see if Sophie and I can visit the new urgent care clinic nearer my God to thee.  No it is by the house.  I am afraid to find out if I really did something stupid to my ankle,   No, I am just going to take it easy for a few days and hope it doesn't get worse.  I can walk on it, which is a good thing.  But because of the osteoporosis I break easily.  But I didn't actually hurt the ankle, just wore a new pair of shoes, which I have since given away.  I had a lovely massage on the leg last night and that truly seemed to help.  No, the psychic pain is too much to bear.  I am used to doing twenty thousand steps a day and I can barely do ten thousand.  And I can't concentrate and have the discipline to practice this morning.  No, just take it easy for a few days and get another  massage Monday before therapy.  But it couldn't hurt to get looked at, could it?

What a pisser.  Stay tuned for tomorrow's installment on one of the new therapist 's job interviews.  This one is Calvin's Mom.

Time to rub a healing cat on my foot to ease the pain.

My gripe du jour

My psychiatrist's office, shall we call LIOBM, has been less than helpful with regards to getting me into a therapist.  I was seeing The Bird within their practice but then decided she wasn't a good fit.  I found another therapist in the same practice only to be told I couldn't see her as it would look like one therapist was swiping another therapist's clients.  This was bullshit as I know of one person who was 'allowed' to do this within the practice.  I got into a bit of a pissing match with the nurse practitioner when I called.  I had called twice asking for referrals and I received no call back. She said she didn't handle referrals anymore and I countered that she at least could have called to tell me that.  Pisser. Of the three names they gave me two never answered their phones or returned calls.  The third , Hyphen II is out of network and would cost a 20% co-pay.  I call that being less than helpful.  I am thinking of pulling out of that practice and going to one a little more responsive to my needs.

In any even I see Hyphen II next Monday.  I think of the two therapists I am test driving I am leaning more towards her than Calvin's Mom.  Calvin's Mom is in my network and I can walk to her office but Hyphen II seems a little more professional and her paperwork is more complete.  Still I will give each a chance.

This has all gotten me pretty upset to say the least.  So much so that I am taking a month off of lessons as I can't find the concentration to focus on playing.  I over did it Valium wise yesterday but at least I was able to sleep last night.  Oh, fux